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So there you are driving through your lost kingdom when suddenly you stop to have a quick look-see checking for termites love bites staged boxing sites So what if there never was a lost kingdom in the first place Now in second place comes Bayonne New Jersey and all the King’s men can’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again Can you Would you My kingdom for a burger for man has no greater glory than to order up order inside and take all nature of things aside Do not lose stride Love is all abyiding it sustains ones self even in the harshest of times Trust me By the light of the silvery spoon Doesn’t matter where you are or if it is March April or June or at  high noon in far off Rangoon Sorry sir you’ll have to catch the very next ride It’s onward march towards Pretoria towards theWaldorf Astoria I deeply emplore ya


This week’s sales special : A life-sized Mickey Mantel robot in full uniform for just five-hundred dollars It doesn’t bat very well but for just four-hundred ninety-five dollars why not I mean occasionally it will hit a limp home run if all the controls are properly lined up If the sun is shining there’s no rain Mickey might automatically argue with the closest umpire Peanuts Cracker Jax pretzels and hot dogs are not encluded

1. Fourteen different sandwiches Charles Lindberg made and ate during his maidan voyage to Paris 2. Thirty-seven full color photos of the Ozark Mountains taken from a eight-hundred mile high angle shot at dawn  3.  How to remove the plastic sheathing from copper wire using only a pair of toe nail clippers and a serrated jelly knife 4.  Cambell’s Premier Cannibal soup recipes with or without bones and or other extraineous matter  5.  Step by step instructions on how to build a thirty foot long full masted sailing boat in your basement  6.  Twenty-nine boxed cereals not safe to feed to your dog and why  7.  Eighteen letters written by left handed Lansing prison inmates now seeking an extension on an early release legislation pending on a early release provision  provided for passage on a local state and federal bases

It has been determined by the American Cattle Ranchers Association in conjunction with the Stock Breeders Co-operative Compendium along with an endorsement from the Northern Universal Sheep Herders Growers and Processors Of The United States has declared that any  animal regardless of species involved in a monetary  transaction irrespective of the fact that a formal written agreement was mutually signed and or officially noterized  and or duly noted or not Any such animal in such a transaction will be deemed to be a cash cow Additionally in order to expand clalify and simplify this staed manifest you jst read it has been universaly declared that all goats and sheep wheather or not they be mountain or vallley sheep heardered or unattended to and all goats both domesticated or in the wild shall be henceforth declared to be cash cows one and all

Three Muskaters  That’s a candy bar  Ever try to buy a two Muskater  bar or a one Muskater You can’t They wouldn’t let you They don’t trust you   What about freedom of choice So what of it You don’t have freedom of choice or freedom either Here let’s step into this bar here I’ll buy ya a chocolate duicurrie Read More »

A group of anti-Trump Polish American citizens marching from the starting point of Columnus Ohio towards Washington in protest of the Trump administration will have reached Get Well Utah by noon to-day

In nature we find that for every action there is a corresponding counter-reaction and so we see that the phenominon of nature’s natural working order at play in outer space as well There exists a slight almost undetectable movement or wave of sound its velocity governed by the moon in its orbit causing an increase in ground movement across the Earth’s floor as it passes across tall marsh grasses for instance Such a movement may be best described as a grass roots action

In 1492 Christopher Columbus in command  of the Spanish galleon the Santa Maria sailed out into uncharted waters searching for the New World and into eternal destiny and ever lasting immortality After sailing for weeks even months perhaps and his crew starving on half rations somewhere near of the coast of what is now called Cuba but none the less still somewhere on or near the year 1492 and under a foggy rain-swept night turns toward his second in command and chief navigator and remarks “Scuttle but has it that Cuba is rather nice this time of year”

T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring when the burglar quietly broke through the front door Man oh man you should have seen the look on that poor bastard’s face when daddy dearest all dressed up in his finest holiday pj’s peppered that guy full of holes with his brand new shot gun   Merry Christmas everyone

Who the hell are you anyway We assume you are operating under an alliance In any event this is a warning Stay the hell away from my home We don’t need or want your braggadociousnes  and all that ho ho ho crap waking up our kids once a year so late at  night One more thing Keep those damn reindeer and all of their droppings the hell off my roof and you can stop climbing down our chimney as well While I’m at it We don’t need nor want the yearly aggravation of having to clean up all that damn dirt dust grim and loose mortar and brick from the fireplace floor anymore and you can forget free loading all those damn cookies as well from now on   Have a nice day